Thursday, August 12, 2010

너무 보고 싶었어요


A month ago I decided to keep it simple and clean. But being the stubborn person I am. I decided to tell you how you are the very few which have that special place in my heart  and how...

" You're amazing just the way you are "

My memories are not in its most perfect of shape nowadays. But it once was, for that one period of time. Even though you are there and I am here, I wish you could hold my hand today as we stroll down memory lane....

Perhaps I should thank Puan Salwiza. If it wasn't for her. I'd probably never knew you. You wouldn't had walked two doors back to meet a fellow named "Emil". Back in school, I rarely had any visitors. So indeed, any event of anyone asking to see me was exciting. Going back to the corner where I first saw you, on that fateful morning, it all started, the beginning of one of the most amazing chapter of my life.

It intrigued me. The following days I spend asking myself, "Why does she look familiar?"  that question was followed by another question, "Maybe she was someone I knew back in Precinct 11?" along with another question which later led to a whole web of questions. With my Sherlock Holmes hat on and bucketful of time. I grab our school's Sinar Putra. As I was turning the pages one by one, my eyes suddenly were glued to that one page

Quickly, a long lost piece of my memory resurfaced. I recalled the first words of 
"the girl who sat next to me" 

note: It's a bit blur. I'm directly behind Dollah

Ah, the debate days were the most fondest memories I have. Unintentionally exchanging smiles while watching someone so petite as the third speaker "belasah-ing" us. Anwar was begging to get out of the room. On the day of the debate competition, I remembered helping you borrowing a tie from one of our juniors and wishing you lotsa lucks. 

At Medan, we had lunch after school, you asked me whether you should go to the bahasa seminar, despite being drained off of energy after the debate, yet you manage to go. You showed me how strong you are that day.

I believe for us SPM candids, we had to struggle a bit more . As Minda Niaga falls on the same year. Excited I was. Knowing our class's stall were next to each other. Heck, I even texted you "Goodluck neighbour" I just knew something great will came up that day. And so it did. From afar, you shouted my name, and we both enjoyed a bowl of jambu batu. It marks the first day I ever hangout with you, and also the first time I ride a motorcycle (which was scary!) 

Tuitions, tuitions. I wasn't much of an early bird. So it was nothing out of the ordinary that kinda hated the GPMS's before. But the evening extra class' were the best. Laughly  changing the reaction of hydrogen to a glowing splinter, K-POP sound. Just goofing off with the teachers while we are suppose to study. Enjoying the brizzy evening in the class. Grabbing a bite or two at the koperasi . Moments to remember. 

You would be sitting behind me while sitting with Ain and Yan. "Mil, sedap lah suara you" you'd say. As during that time I was practicing for my performance for Hari Guru (in class!) Ah, I even gathered the courage to ask you if you are in for a movie, 17 Teen Again? Nah, Transformers !  

May 14th, it was the last day of the educational fair. And I promised I would take you there. As the minutes pass by the night before, my mom kept asking "Mil, bila nak pergi KLCC punya edu fair? PWTC and Mid nya da pergi dah". And no matter how many times she asked that, I'd answer "Takpe ma, esok Mil pergi dengan kawan". Although, at that moment, I was already beginning to face facts. Yet, being the optimistically stubborn person that I am, I cramped as much info there is to know about the twist and turns around KL. 

And I didn't regret a second of it. Around 11 the next morning, you called, I of course, still in an epic slumber prior to last nights enlightenment. I dressed my best and there we were, in Hall 2 of the educational fair, talking to the funny old English gentleman who kept majal-ing us. And for the first time, catching the KTM which was milimetres away from PWTC. To be honest, I was a bit worried as you were boarding the train. The border from the platform to the train was as wide as the Pasific Ocean! 

Ah, I remembered whispering "Naz, hati-hati naz." 

The journey to Mid Valley was a nightmare, and we both agreed we HATE KTM. Oh, It was different though, hanging out with you. Never thought I'd step inside stores like Topman, Seed, MNG and the like. It was funny though...when we were at Popeyes and all you ordered was a bowl of coleslaw and a bottle of water. To the point I had my OMG face on. I was like; "Naz, cukup ke tu?" ..."Mil, more than cukup" 

It was a blast, showing you all my favourite shops in The Gardens. Watching you getting excited of all the Kpop albums at Rock Corner and joyously smiling looking at all the cute plushies at Action City, DOMO! 

And where else could you see me banging by head on a guitar...TWICE! Iqram was having his holidays for NS. Given that me, Ain had jammed at Iqram's several times before. I was dying to see you on the guitar. And we alway needed a female vocalist. So I said "Iqram, ajak la Naz". I remember walking to your house. Since it was extremely hot, we sat inside for awhile. After arriving at Iqram's under Ain's new P, "Safely" that is. And although, our rendition of Saltwater Room was fairly okay. It was a blast. 

"Mil, miscall phone I jap" you said" Just before we were set to leave, you lost your phone. I was almost to the door, Iqram and Ain was nearest to you. Yet quickly you called my name.  Maybe you didn't realize this. But perhaps deep inside you, you do realize I'd always be there for you if you ever are in trouble. Likewise at Saujana, when you assumed you lose your specs and left your pink card. 

Months had passed since then. Rarely did we talk. I thought I was bound to have a lame birthday. Iqram and I planned to watch Toy Story 3. Little did I know, what a simple text to a friend can do. I got the birthday that I always wanted. Clearly, the pondok on top of the hill made it all happen. It was the highlight of the year

On June 23th, along with May 14th, it was the greatest 24 hours of my life!  

Maybe you wished you a photographic memory. Trust me, having a photographic memory is nowhere near something nice to possess when you have one and a half year of priceless memories to forget

A day at the beach. Enjoying the view of the sunset. Just before cutting the cake. Or mailing you a present. Even maybe a buffet at Seoul Garden with the others. Among the many few things I hoped I could do this year. 

"Wonder if you're reading this though. If you are, Naz

I'm not expecting to see you again during Raya, nor I'm to see you during your sem break. Heck, I'm not even expecting to see you until you've finish your MD in Ireland, which I know you will, and I know you'd enjoy it there

But if we do see each other again, and although things will be totally different. I wish, we'd start it out with a simple, " Hey, how have you been?"

Whatever happens in the future to me,  whether I'd totally change to be a better person , inside out, or not. I hope you will be happy, as happy as you, me and all our friends were, on the...

12th of August, of 2009 

Wish I could do this again 

Disclaimer: All of the above may or may not depict a strong sense of affection to this particular she. It also may suggest we once had a special relationship. None of them are true, since we clearly are just friends. Not more or less. Thank You


  1. wow....

    I'm speechless..

    dunno what to say though

  2. saying Happy Birthday Kak Naz is enuf..

  3. okeyh

    Happy Birthday Kak Naz <333


  4. hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha :D

    i like the pic when my hands in it. <3

    btw emil, there were to many fishes in the sea. trust me, i was my specialties after all(someday).
    so, when you go on fishing better u pull the rods whenever u caught one.
    never wait for the special fish although u use a special kind of bait or perphaps u try harder.
    maybe that fish would not ever bite your bait, as she knew it was u.

    n emil, maybe the fish likes to swimming near to your rod and your bait. but never ever cross in her mind be your catch of the day or year or forever.

    conclusion? paham x? haha. my english never better as yours. so, pham2 je la sndiri. haha.

    emil, keep your heart. maintain your kindness, and Gog bless you for your soulmate-finding.

    hahahahaha :D

  5. haaa anwar singgah gak ko kat blog ak xD

    well, interesting use of metaphors. lol. "my rod" ;D

    but yeah I completely see what you are trying to say. Thanks

    But for now ean, this is what I have to go tru b4 I can move on. Or as u say " find a new fish that would catch my bait ;DD "

    ( yup ak un suka gamba tu haha ^^" )